We are the guardians of the living room rug. The avengers of hallway carpeting. The brave souls willing to bite the crap out of any vacuum cleaner we see. We stand vigilant in the face of HEPA filters and self-retracting cords.

We are the Vacuum Cleaner Defense League.

While millions of lives are threatened daily, our work will never end. No one is safe until we say NO to vacuum cleaners.

Meet the Members

  • Molly - VCDL crop
    Molly, High Jump Champion (2014-present)

    I’ve known Thor for a long time. He’s a solid candidate and a good runner. Plus, the speed with which he loses his sh*t around vacuums is amazing. Truly inspiring.


  • Rocket - VCDL crop
    Rocket, Drummer

    I’ve heard that if you pee directly into the bag compartment, your humans will eventually have to give it away because of the smell.


  • Brutus- VCDL crop
    Brutus, Biology Teacher

    I watched a shop vac drink up all the water in the bird fountain. I didn’t know they could do that. It was terrible. Those poor thirsty birds.