We are the guardians of the living room rug. The avengers of hallway carpeting. The brave souls willing to bite the crap out of any vacuum cleaner we see. We stand vigilant in the face of HEPA filters and self-retracting cords.

We are the Vacuum Cleaner Defense League.

While millions of lives are threatened daily, our work will never end. No one is safe until we say NO to vacuum cleaners.

Meet the Members

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    Baxter, Contortionist and part-time Swim Coach.

    You think this will stop me? YOU FOOL! This is but a temporary set back. I will have that power cord Kristin, you mark my words.



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    Hertz, Comptroller, Texas Instruments

    You keep calling it a Dyson Ten but I’m warning you, if that thing get’s any closer IT’S GONNA BE A DYSON ATE.


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    Robin, Building Maintenance Lead

    Listen, I didn’t spend two years at the Bob Reichhardt School of Building Maintenece for nothing. I know what I’m talking about here. Floors do not need to be that clean.