Meet the Members


Stella Luna: Ear Model

Why are you taking that thing out of the closet again? You know I’m just gonna go bat-sh*t crazy. DID YOU FORGET WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME, JILL?


Stella Luna, 9 mo.

Sam and Dean: Expert Marksmen

We don’t approve of vacuum cleaners, do we Sam?   -Dean

No Dean, we do not. I think we should pee on that one as soon as possible.   -Sam


Sam and Dean, 6 months


Finlay: Adorable Anger  Management Team.

That vacuum cleaner stole my ball, guys! What do I do? IT STOLE MY H*CKEN BALL.

Finlay, 10 weeks

Hank, Aquatics Instructor and Shoreline Enthusiast

I heard you have to go for the hose part. Rip it right out. You can’t show these things any mercy whatsoever.

Hank, 4 yr.

Sophie, 1 yo.
Sophie, avid guardian of living room rug.

I mean, I have no problem with the hand-held jobbies but that big guy? No, he’s got to go. He almost ate one of my feet last time.

Sophie, 1 yr.

Scooby and Dani, Exotic Grain Enthusiasts
Scooby and Dani, Breakfast Cereal Enthusiasts

Someone spilled a bowl of quinoa the other day and the vacuum ate everything before we could even try it. – Dani

I’ve never had quinoa before. Now I never will. -Scooby

Scooby 3 yr and Dani 6 yr

Teagan, a large fluffy black dog louging
Teagan, Irish Ambassador and Donut Safety Activist.

I watched an industrial shop vac eat my favorite sock. It was horrible. I loved that sock. This insanity has to end.

Teagan, 2 yr.

Louie, Patron Saint of Dollies
Louie, Patron Saint of Dollies

Louie would have rather attended a tea party in full Edwardian dress than face the vacuum cleaner. Pinkies up for Louie!

Louie (In Memoriam)

Bert, Senior Feline Citizen
Bert, Senior Feline Citizen

In my day we didn’t have any of these fancy hand-held types. We had Hoovers and you had to run or they would tear the tail right off your a$$.

Bert, 22 yo

Moyer, Disgruntled Cat
Moyer, Disgruntled Cat

This is b@llsh*t, man. Complete BS.

Moyer, 6 yo.